[Alicia Davis] So have you ever had a conversation with someone and for some reason, it was harder than you thought it would be? And you walked away just not feeling good about it? If so, that’s what we’re going to talk about today in terms of our emotional intelligence part four – right Stacie – which is around, how do we really use emotional intelligence to really support our relationship building.
[Stacie Watson] Absolutely. You know, I think that maybe more than any of the other components of emotional intelligence, this is the one we notice because it shows up in the ways that we’re interacting with each other.
[Alicia Davis] That’s right.
[Stacie Watson] And I think that, you know, many times we do have expectations about how conversations will go or how meetings will go. And when things aren’t going the way that we thought, I think often we can, again, make up stories about what that’s all about. And this is where, you know, the last video, we talked about the power of curiosity. And, you know, I think this is another place where curiosity can really matter when we’re thinking about how is our relationship actually working in this kind of challenging moment.
[Alicia Davis] That’s right. That’s right. And, you know, when – I think you said something a little bit earlier – which was, you know, emotional intelligence isn’t that big of a deal when the conversation is going well, right? When everything’s going fine, it’s just fine. It’s when we get into those really sticky situations where I have a difference of opinion than you do. Or we’re sometimes compressed in time, or we’re both feeling anxious about something. Like when we come together, right, that dynamic that is created, gets really difficult, sometimes, or challenging. So that’s when we really need to have all of the tools in our tool belt around emotional intelligence, right? We pause a little bit, we breathe a little bit, we say, okay… Try to ask a couple more questions, and try to listen a little bit more intently. And then be really mindful about how we’re how we’re responding versus reacting in the conversation, right?
[Stacie Watson] Absolutely. You know, just from one simple practice, it may be just going back to the person after that difficult conversation, and saying, how did that feel for you? Or how did that work for you? And do you mind if I share my experience? And if we don’t think we did or accomplished what we needed to, can we have a do-over or try again? And, you know, again, it’s bringing that spirit of curiosity can sort of help people be a bit more at ease, and we can have a little bit more of a conversation about the conversation, and maybe approach it from a different place. I mean, being a human being is complicated, and being in relationships with other human beings is exponentially complicated.
[Alicia Davis] That’s right.
[Stacie Watson] And emotional intelligence is a really important way that we navigate that complication, I think more successfully.
[Alicia Davis] That’s right. And we would love to know how you do it. Direct message us @TLS_transforms. Email us info@TLS transforms.com. And we really want to know, how do you navigate through this sometimes difficult journey called life, specifically in relationships with, with other people with other people at work with other people at home? So I’m Alicia Davis.
{Stacie Watson] I’m Stacie Watson.
[Alicia Davis] We are the owners of Transformative Leadership Strategies and we’d love to have a conversation with you about emotional intelligence, whether it’s for yourself or with your team. So be in touch with us and thanks so much for listening. Take good care.
[Stacie Watson] Thank you.
