“Giving productive and respectful feedback is a skill set that most of us have never learned.”
~ Brené Brown
We are approaching the time of year when many ‘year-end’ conversations are occurring. Or perhaps the time of year when ‘year-end’ conversations are supposed to occur.
It’s always interesting to talk to leaders about the feedback process. For many of us, giving feedback is fraught with fear, and/or a worry that we’re just not very good at it.
We’re also approaching the Thanksgiving holiday, so what better time to combine the topic of giving feedback with the idea of preparing a meal? Sounds crazy, but that’s just what Kristen Meneghello did in a Forbes article that we wanted to share.
In her article, she normalizes some of the challenges in giving feedback by using the metaphor of preparing a meal. Her three-step process includes:
- Prepare the meal: Like chopping onions or celery, preparing to give feedback is as important at the feedback itself. She talks about the importance of setting intention and understanding impact. She also reminds us that we need to check in on our own thoughts and feelings going into the conversation.
- Cook the ingredients: This is where the conversation actually starts and, in this step, Kristin reminds us of the importance of setting an intention with the other person. She then recommends focusing on the facts, including specific situations and behaviors – and then ultimately touching on the actual impact.
- Sit down to the meal together: In this final step, you are inviting the other person into the conversation, and learning about their perspectives. It’s at this point where coaching can be really helpful – pointing out opportunities to have different responses to challenging situations.
As you approach giving feedback to staff members over the coming weeks, we invite you to read Kristin’s article and consider how you approach each of these steps. As you develop more comfort in giving feedback, you will likely find you are feeling more confident as a leader overall.
Giving effective feedback is a key component of our ‘Communicate to Drive Action’ learning session. If this is an area that you and/or leaders within your organization struggle with, reach out and we’ll be glad to discuss how we can help you and your team build this skill set!
